Let’s Talk About That Game Of Thrones Finale

HBO’s hit series Game of Thrones wrapped up its fifth season yesterday, and boy, the Internet is not happy about it.

You can probably assume spoilers for the final episode of Season 5 follow, so scoot (with haste!) if you’re not caught up.

The once bulging cast list now resembles an unstocked supermarket shelf following the mass culling in the most recent episode, somewhat ironically titled “Mother’s Mercy.”

One fallen soldier in particular has social media in bargaining mode, theorising ways for him to return, but let's not forget all the others who were felled along the way to that final shocking slaying.

Join us as we pour one out for the many, many lost souls:

Selyse Baratheon was the first to go, having hanged herself in the woods following the barbecuing of her daughter Shireen in the previous ep.

Her husband Stannis, responsible for Shireen’s sacrifice, wasn’t much longer for Westeros, having been outnumbered by the Bolton clan’s army and left open to a beheading by Brienne.

This leaves the official contenders for the Iron Throne down to a “lucky” few. (If Cersei’s walk of shame down the streets of King’s Landing – not to mention Dany’s frustrating misadventures in Meereen - taught us anything, ruling truly blows.)

Princess Myrcella died next, of Sand Snake poisoning, shortly after hugging Uncle Dad. This is literally the only thing of significance that happened in Dorne.

Some of the show’s climactic executions were satisfying, though, with everything on this show, they each came with massive caveats.

Myranda – who once giddily watched as Theon Greyjoy was castrated – suffered the indignity of being dropped from the side of a castle by Theon’s sniveling alter ego Reek. (What that means for Reek and Sansa, who not-so-smartly jumped off the other side as a form of escape despite literally seeing what gravity did to Myranda’s grape-like head, remains unknown).

Arya took grisly vengeance against Ser Meryn, only to be punished by Jacquen - or, umm, someone with his face - and robbed of her sight.

However, one such assassination delivered no satisfaction to viewers: that of Jon Snow, who, fittingly, died for knowing nothing.

Despite months of clues indicating a rebellion was swelling against the new Lord Commander, he cluelessly strolled into a corner where his fellow Watchers could knife him with impunity.

There are plenty of theories that indicate a return for Jon Snow in some form (maybe as a wolf, maybe as a white walker) but actor Kit Harington has been telling every interviewer under the sun he’s not coming back. Most significantly: he’s cut his hair. That may be the biggest tragedy of all.

Feel free to share your condolences, theories and expectations for Season 6 in the comments section. Remember: Bran’s back next season. Tell us why we should care below!