Woman Sets Fire to Pennywise Doll in Only Sane Response to It Floating Into Her Yard

And now comes the most 'NOPE' news story of the year.

A New Jersey woman had no choice but to set fire to a Pennywise doll that floated into her backyard, in what is either the work of actual Satan, a teen prank, or a bit of clever movie PR.

According to USA Today, Renee Jensen and her boyfriend were catching some rays outside their Harrington Park, NJ home when a plush version of Stephen King’s It villain suddenly "floated" over their fence.

But this was no regular clown toy. It had curious markings on its head. So, Jensen did what any rational person would do: killed it with fire.

And yes, before you ask, she did call the cops first, and they came, but refused to touch it. Protect and serve? Not when the supernatural imaginings of Stephen King are involved, it seems.

Jensen, who owns a reiki and intuitive healing business, initially tied to burn it with a lighter... but it wouldn’t take b-b-b-because it w-w-w-was f-f-f-flame retardant. (Oh, I suppose that's not so scary, and just what toymakers are required by law to do with their playthings for kids.)

Her next move came right out of the playbook for Incinerating the Tools of the Devil:

"I put olive oil on it," she told USA Today.

"Still wouldn't light. Then I put newspaper on it and light it up on fire."

Here's an artist's rendition of what that moment must have looked like.

Jensen finally burned sage around her property and went to bed with a knife for additional protection.

Would you believe that It: Chapter 2 (the trailer for which includes footage of Pennywise literally floating in the sky) lands in cinemas next month? Keep your eyes on the skies!

Header Image: Warner Bros. Pictures / Facebook (Renee Jensen)