Wanna Spend More Time With Mates IRL? Studies Show You’re Not Alone

We all know how convenient it is to chat with friends online.

Whether it’s in a group chat or sending the occasional TikTok meme to a mate let them know you’re thinking of them, it’s almost too easy.

However, nothing really beats getting to connect with mates in-person.

VicHealth released some new insights after surveying young people aged between 18-25, revealing that young people are keen to connect in-person and want to reduce their screen time.

VicHealth’s Manager of Social Connection and Mental Wellbeing Kevin Kapeke says young people said seeing their friends in person “helps them build meaningful connections, and can foster a sense of belonging and community.”

“Our survey also found that young people understand the need for balance between the online and offline world, but need a bit of support to act,” says Kevin.

It can be tricky when it comes to making time to see mates outside of school, study, work, and other commitments. It can even be quite daunting to just get out to socialise.

We spoke to sisters Sarah and Alex Arrowsmith, who are finding ways to stay connected in-person while they juggle with full-time study and work.

Alex, 18, has just started full-time study and describes how hard it is to catch up with friends from high school after all taking different pathways.

“My screen time has increased since high school and it’s definitely hard to keep it balanced.”

Sarah, 23, works full-time and agrees that staying in touch on social media is a lot easier than trying to catch up with people in person.

“Especially now, all my friends are away so it’s really hard to meet up with them. Most of my friends also work full time and I work, like, weird hours so trying to catch up with them when I’m working until like sometimes 10 o’clock at night… It’s so hard to figure out a time that suits everyone,” Sarah says.

We joked about “everyone” seemingly travelling Europe this time of year, and FOMO kicking in, but Sarah had a positive outlook on it.

“I’ve seen the whole of Croatia… the whole of Malta… and I haven’t left my house!” she laughs.

So what do Sarah and Alex do to try and connect more offline?

Since starting at uni, Alex has found a tight group of friends she can socialise and work with.

“It’s really good because all of us, we’re in the same boat… We’ve got that face-to-face contact… Sometimes we stay back and we sit there and we do our assignments, make sure that we’re on top of all of it, and we just help each other out that way.”

Sarah gets to connect with friends through sport, like socialising at the gym, as well as playing and umpiring netball games.

However, she recognises that it’s more effort to get together with mates that aren’t involved with similar interests and activities, but it’s about making “more of a conscious effort to message them”.

While chatting with Sarah and Alex about their extra-curricular activities, it was clear they love staying active.

What about those who aren’t? (a.k.a. me)

The VicHealth study stated 47% of participants said one of their biggest barriers to trying new activities where they can connect with others was “not having enough energy”.

Sarah and Alex suggest finding a group of people who shares the same interests and taking the leap to join them.

“Making the time is the hardest bit,” says Alex. “Make a timetable and schedule things in so you know what you have to do each day can decrease your stress.”

If the thought of going out with mates might make your bank account stressed, Sarah has a few suggestions of activities you can try.

“During COVID, I went for a lot of walks with friends… Another thing that’s really good is that a lot of community centres have free programs,” says Sarah. “There’s so many free things at universities as well that you can join.”

You can read more about ways to stay connected IRL with mates here.

Image: Supplied.